This Is the Easiest Way to Teach Your Kids Problem-Solving Skills (And It Actually Works!)
Ever sat in an audit meeting, digging deep into a problem, and thought, "Why am I asking why so many times?" That was me during my MedTech days. The 5 Whys—a problem-solving method we used for audits—was a lifesaver.
But one day, as I scribbled yet another “why” on my report, a lightbulb 💡 went off.
Why not use this at home with my kids?
If it’s good enough for ISO standards, surely it can help us tackle why homework is mysteriously undone or why bedtime turns into an endless negotiation.
And let me tell you—it works like magic. Well, most of the time. 😜
What’s the Deal with 5 Whys?
The 5 Whys is a simple but genius technique. You ask “why” five times (give or take) to get to the root of a problem. It’s like peeling an onion, except fewer tears.
Example: Why Your Kid Won’t Do Homework
Why didn’t you finish your homework? “Because I forgot.”
Why did you forget? “Because I didn’t write it in my planner.”
Why didn’t you write it in your planner? “Because I couldn’t find my planner.”
Why couldn’t you find your planner? “Because my desk is a mess.”
Why is your desk a mess? “Because I never clean it.”
Boom. Problem identified. Now you can tackle the messy desk and prevent the homework drama.
Teaching Kids the 5 Whys
Kids are natural questioners. They ask why all the time. Use that curiosity to teach them problem-solving skills they can use forever. Here’s how to do it:
1. Start with a Simple Problem
Example: “Why did the milk spill?”
Walk them through each “why” until they understand the root cause. Spoiler: It’s usually because someone was running. 🤦🏻♀️
2. Make It Fun
Turn it into a game. Award “detective points” for every good question they ask. 🕵🏻♂️
3. Use Everyday Scenarios
Missed the school bus? Use 5 Whys.
Lost a shoe? 5 Whys.
Fighting with siblings? You guessed it—5 Whys.
4. Keep It Light
No judgment or nagging. The goal is to understand, not blame.
Why This Works (Yes, I see the irony)
Builds Critical Thinking Your kids learn to dig deeper instead of accepting the first answer.
Encourages Ownership When they identify the problem, they’re more likely to fix it.
Reduces Meltdowns A clear path to the solution = fewer tantrums (for everyone).
Real-Life Example from My Home
Last week, my youngest was in full meltdown mode because “I don’t have anything to wear!” Instead of rolling my eyes, I pulled out the 5 Whys.
Why don’t you have anything to wear? “Because my favorite shirt is dirty.”
Why is your favorite shirt dirty? “Because I wore it yesterday.”
Why didn’t you put it in the laundry? “Because I forgot.”
Why did you forget? “Because I was rushing.”
Why were you rushing? “Because I woke up late.”
Ah-ha! We need a better morning routine. Problem solved. Crisis averted. Mom gets a gold star. ⭐
Challenges and How to Handle Them
1. Kids Saying “I Don’t Know”
Tip: Give them time to think. Or rephrase the question. Sometimes, “What do you think happened?” works better.
2. Too Many Whys
Tip: If you’re stuck in a never-ending loop, wrap it up. Five is a guideline, not a rule.
3. Blame Game
Tip: Focus on solutions, not fault. Say, “How can we fix this?” instead of “Who’s responsible?”
Why You Should Try This at Home (Oops, another why!)
Parenting is hard. But it doesn’t have to be chaotic. The 5 Whys helps you and your kids work together to solve problems without drama.
So, the next time your kid says, “I can’t find my shoes!” instead of losing your cool, channel your inner detective. Ask why, why, why, and watch the magic happen. ✨
Parenting is just a series of tiny audits anyway. Might as well make it fun. 😉
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